An Update on Me

Lately life hasn't been to easy for me. Maybe it hasn't been life, but just my view of it that has left my in bed crying and waking up with red eyes reflecting an aching heart.

The pressure from school was too much. Ive always been pretty good with my academics but it hasn't ever been what i love and what i want to do. At school, academics is what you eat, live and breathe. And the only question asked is: what are you going to do next year??? Quite honestly it feels like poison shoved down my throat. On weekends I go home and life is good. I revive the person with the paint brush.

At school people seldom understand what i mean by 'i want to go home' - home is not just a place where i sleep. It is my fortress where my battery is charged.

So this weekend i went 'home' after an emotionally draining week and Saturday night i cried again. My mom and dad where there for me, which means the world to me. Sunday night i spoke to my mother. She successfully reminded me that we have never been the family who only has academics and university in mind. I have never been a person who slept at one in the morning because i studied. And you know what? I was fine, actually more than fine. I am not going to university next year. Not because i wont qualify, but because God has another plan and this i know for sure.
I am going to go home and live with my family - be a family that God can send anytime he needs to. Contrary to what many may think, this not as easy as it sound.

SO next time you ask me what i want to do, don't expect the answer you want.


  1. This is beautiful, and believe me when I say, I can understand and relate to what you are going through, or what's going through you, rather (lol)... I am finishing my honours degree this year, but I am not going to work next year, I am going home to my family and be a person God can send anywhere, anytime :) Weird hey...?

    1. Sorry for the late reply. It's always nice to hear that someone reads, understands and appreciates my blog :)And its nice to know that someone else feels the same way you do, means you're maybe not that crazy after all =) Well I hope your year will be one to remember! You're probably happy to be finishing your studies? I sure am happy to leave school :)... Keep me up to date on what 2013 throws at you please!


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